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Tuesday, 22 November 2011

BATSHIT Bingo- The Ultimate Benedict Andrews Bingo Cards

Need something to amuse yourself during the tedious hours of any Benedict Andrews production? Welcome to:


 BENEDICT BINGO



Playing is easy and free! Simply use your card to keep track of all the elements typically seen during a Benedict Andrews production. If any item listed on your card comes into use, just cross it off.



If you can cross off any row across, down or horizontally, YOU’VE GOT BATSHIT BINGO!

Be sure to let the audience know!

Congratulations!



USE OF A GLASS BOX OR PERSPEX WALLS
ANYTHING THAT FALLS FROM THE GODS EG ASH, GLITTER, ETC
USE OF NEON OR FLASHING LIGHTS
SMEARING OF EXCREMENT OR USE OF BODILY FLUIDS
USE OF A FLYING FOX
STILL HERE AT 11PM
WASTE OF TALENTED ACTORS
STATIC, IMMOBILE ACTING
USE OF THE SAME ACTORS YOU SAW IN HIS PREVIOUS SHOWS
SCRUFFY FAUX BEARDS
DISRESPECT FOR AUDIENCE
DIRECTOR’S NOTES IN NO WAY CORRELATE TO THE ACTION ON STAGE
BIZARRE GERMAN OR FOREIGN REFERENCES OUT OF CONTEXT
CLASSICAL WORK BUTCHERED
INDULGENT OR NON-SENSICAL MONOLOGUE
ACTORS AS FAR REMOVED FROM THE AUDIENCE AS POSSIBLE

Got the idea…you can add to your table by inserting 4 of your own BATSHIT (Benedict Andrews Theatrical Show Intellectualised Tricks) items below to complete your bingo set.











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17 comments:

  1. Dennis McCutcheon22 November 2011 at 09:54

    LOL! Why not? We've been playing David Williamson bingo and Neil Armfield bingo and Gale Edwards/Brian Thomson bingo for years after all, and they're even more predictable!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous24 November 2011 at 20:27

    Wow you're good! Now can you do the same for Picasso, Shakespeare, Motzart and Orson Welles?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous25 November 2011 at 15:12

    Not nice...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous28 November 2011 at 16:01

    Brilliant and spot on!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous3 December 2011 at 12:14

    Are you insane, unhappy or just bored? Seriously.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous7 December 2011 at 16:53

    Dear Mr Anonymous 24th of November. your attempt at sarcasm is just plain stupid...you're honestly comparing Benedict Andrews to Picasso, Shakespeare, MOZART (not Motzart!) and Orson Welles? I suggest you review your classics and then retry your hand at sarcasm.

    Back to the subject; great work Jane! Very funny and very accurate!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anonymous14 December 2011 at 21:12

    I love this! You could add 'The use of a revolve' in a square. 'Trashing of the set' could be another.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous17 December 2011 at 20:12

    Why did Benedict Andrews cross the road?
    Because it looked AMAZING

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous6 February 2012 at 11:13

    This is perfect. The Seagull may not have impressed, but I couldn't stop giggling when the ash began to fall. Classic Andrews.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Motherhugger29 March 2015 at 22:07

    A colleague recommended your blog to me after I complained about the state of theatre in Sydney - Simon Stone and Benedict Andrews (after Kosky) have ruined theatre for me. So glad I'm not the only one calling out this bullshit.
    And where are the female directors? (At this point, frankly, I'd be happy with any director who didn't present as a person who has never cleaned anything, cared for anyone, someone who has a vision of a better world rather than one created by a mind fuelled by pizza, porn, torture, misogyny and reality tv.)

    ReplyDelete
  11. Motherhugger29 March 2015 at 22:32

    I could have used this Bingo card during Kosky's 1997 Tartuffe, and Andrews' Measure for Measure in 2010. I'm still waiting for things to improve.
    http://motherhugger.blogspot.com.au/2011/03/more-on-theatre-directors.html

    ReplyDelete
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